When people complain about their insomnia as if it were a badge of honor, I find I have nothing to contribute to the discussion. I never have trouble sleeping. Waking up from a deep sleep, yes, but never falling asleep. If I sound smug itâ€™s because I am. I am a virtuoso at sleep. I can fall asleep anywhere, and fast. When I was in college I would get on the bus, find a window seat, lean against the glass, and lose consciousness. Yes, I was one of those annoying passengers who lurched and swayed with every motion of the bus, occasionally crashing into a fellow passenger. If I ever drooled on you I apologize, and I hope my saliva did not eat through fabric, or worse, bone. Terrible when that happens. . .