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Twisted by Jessica Zafra – Pumping irony since 1994
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Archive for May, 2010

Portrait of the artist as an expat

May 29, 2010 By: jessicazafra Category: Announcements, Books 3 Comments →

I love this photograph. So elegant.

Your designs on Roger and Rafa

May 28, 2010 By: jessicazafra Category: Clothing, Tennis 1 Comment →

Our Prince of Persia costume design competition was a scream, let’s do it again!

This time let’s mess with the outfits of two of our favorite guys, Roger Federer and Rafael Nadal.


Rafa and Roger at the Madrid Open final last year. Photo from The Tennis Times.

The French Open is on, and we’re hoping for a Roger-Rafa final so we can throw a party on finals night. But I have one problem with men’s tennis, and I’ve been bringing it up for years: the shorts are too long. I grew up in the Borg-McEnroe era, when the players basically wore hot pants. Today’s on-court outfits for men are generally blah—not just the shorts, but the shirts.

Roger looks great in regular clothes and his Wimbledon ensembles are interesting even if sportswriters hate them. But the playing attire is not distinguished enough for the player recognized as the greatest ever.

The humongous biceps erase any complaint you might have about Rafa’s short-sleeved shirts, but those capri pants have to go. (And he needs a proper tailor for his suits.)

Save them from their boring outfits.

You know where this is leading, right? Design on-court attire worthy of the two greatest players of our time. Email your designs to urban.matthias@gmail.com. The deadline: 5 June 2010, the day before the men’s final. The prize is…a surprise!

What about ‘Ashes to ashes, dust to dust’?

May 28, 2010 By: jessicazafra Category: Movies, Music, Philippine Reference Alert 3 Comments →

From Vulture in New York magazine:

Steve Carell has shown off his musical pipes on film many times, whether crooning “Age of Aquarius” in The 40 Year Old Virgin, or harmonizing with Dane “voice of an angel” Cook in Dan in Real Life. But does he have what it takes to play an international pop idol? Warner Bros. thinks so: Vulture has learned that the studio is negotiating to buy the rights to remake the unreleased documentary Of All the Things — which traced Dennis Lambert’s transformation from musical hit-maker to suburban Florida real-estate agent to one of the most beloved pop stars in the Philippines — as a comedic starring vehicle for Carell.

During the late sixties until the mid-eighties, Lambert was one of pop music’s top songwriters, writing, co-writing, or producing hits like the Four Tops’ “Ain’t No Woman (Like the One I Got)”; Glen Campbell’s “Rhinestone Cowboy”; The Commodores’ Grammy-winning “Nightshift”; Starship’s “We Built This City” — and, yes, even “Baby Come Back” by the one-hit wonder Player.

In 1972, in the middle of all that offstage success, Lambert made his first and only attempt at being a recording artist: He cut a little-heard album called Bags and Things. It sank like a stone, and was quickly forgotten almost everywhere — but not in the Philippines, where it took off; even today the record’s single, “Of All the Things,” remains a staple at Filipino weddings. . . Read the article in New York.

I have three songs by Dennis Lambert in my iPod. I got them off Juan’s iTunes library.

Books on covers

May 28, 2010 By: jessicazafra Category: Books, Design 2 Comments →

Brilliant

Give it to them!

May 27, 2010 By: jessicazafra Category: Contest, Design, Movies 1 Comment →

We were supposed to have two winners for our Prince of Persia costume design competition, but after reviewing your entries we decided to have five. They are. . .

Alrey for his hommage to Lady Gaga.

Click on the thumbnails to see the full photos.

Issa Miyake for the tribute to one of my all-time favorite musicians. (I’ll say it again: If I Was Your Girlfriend has to be sung by a boy or it loses its perverse charm.)

Catarina for the live headdress featuring my favorite household companion.

Rafael for working it.

And Mikel for his professionalism.

Congratulations, designers. You will each receive the official Prince of Persia wristwatch. You can claim your watches starting tomorrow, 28 May 2010, between 11 am and 5 pm at the Columbia Pictures office, 5th floor (Shaw Boulevard side), Shangri-La Plaza Mall, Mandaluyong. Look for Kat Colobong; I gave her your names as they appear in your emails to Mat.

Prince of Persia opens today in Metro Manila theatres. Unfortunately the 3D version won’t be available locally so no swords in your face, but you can still imagine Jake wearing the designs above.

Name that politician

May 27, 2010 By: jessicazafra Category: Current Events, Language 6 Comments →


The owl and the pussycat went to sea if at all, in a beautiful pea green boat. They took some honey, if at all, and plenty of money wrapped up in a five-pound note, if at all.

As long as we’re noticing the speech patterns of politicians:

Which Philippine politician constantly uses the phrase “if at all”?

And I mean often enough to merit if at all rehab. If at all.

Do you know who it is, if at all?

Is “If at all” the new “At this point in time” if at all?

If at all, post your answer!

Tick tock tick tock tick tock. . .

* * * * *

1018. We have one wrong answer and one correct answer if at all. Pay attention if at all, people, these are your leaders if at all.

* * * * *

1800. I am so disappointed. Clearly you don’t listen, if at all. Hell I don’t listen, but I couldn’t fail to notice the constant repetition. If at all, you need to go back to your listening comprehension exercises. The answer is Chiz Escudero. If you google “Chiz Escudero if at all” you will see samples of what I’m talking about. If at all.