Reviewed by Ricky, Raymond, and Jessica
– One word to describe Michael Bay’s direction: Corny.
– Too busy and frantic, tries too hard to be cute, no one has time for an emotional reaction.
– I know some guys who cried at the Transformers animated movie when a character died. In this movie when someone dies I feel nothing but exhaustion.
– He doesnâ€™t know when to stop, he just throws everything in.
– You didnâ€™t love my Pearl Harbor, and now you will pay!
– Basically this movie was directed by a dick.
– If it were a song it would be Endless Love. Cheese on top of cheese on top of cheese.
– What is the cheesiest Lionel Richie song? Endless Love, All Night Long, or Hello?
– Especially the part in the video where he picks up the phone and sings, Hello.
– Guess the one Lionel Richie song I like.
– Thatâ€™s easy, Easy.
– I like the cover by Faith No More.
– What’s with all the lens flares?!
– Help, I canâ€™t tell the good robots from the bad robots, to me they all look like. . .robots.
– The humans look orange.
– Shia’s nose is enormous. (You know what they say about guys with big noses. Giant boogers.)
– Megan’s boobs should get separate billing.
– Core audience of Transformers, Revenge of the Fallen: 14-year-old boys.
– Gaah, the soundtrack. Thereâ€™s my emo rock quota for all of 2009.
– Oh please, not another shot of guys in uniform all in a row walking towards the camera in slow motion.
– Oy and more jets launched from aircraft carriers. Thereâ€™s a fetish.
– Steven Spielberg should’ve smacked Michael Bay for every hero shot.
– Eek, thereâ€™s a poster of an earlier Michael Bay movie.
– Look at Megan’s amazing skin-tight white pants, they can cross a desert without getting dirty!
– Note gleeful destruction of antiquities.
– They took bits from Star Wars, Lord of the Rings, The Matrix, Raiders of the Lost Ark, Battlestar Galactica, everything.
– But John Turturro is always worth watching.
– Josh Duhamel: Ryan Seacrest as a man.
– The last sequence is a football game. Throwing, running, tackling.
– Transformers is really about the American car industry and how it protects the people. Ironically the American car industry has just been declared dead.
– Transformers would be fun if you didnâ€™t feel like youâ€™d been slapped around for two hours, twenty minutes. Then again itâ€™s a movie about cars that are really alien warrior robots.