Twisted by Jessica Zafra – Pumping irony since 1994

Archive for August, 2009

Poster girls

August 31, 2009 By: jessicazafra Category: Contest, Movies 6 Comments →

Kimmy and Dora

The bored of judges Raymond Lee has spoken. Here are the winners of our Kimmy Dora poster contest:

Entry #2: kurt, 4: jonesalvarezcastro, 6: teddyramos, 7: saintbarry, 13: roxieyap, 26: mylawhite, 27: monroeic, 30: fishfishfish, and 33: xaru4ever.

Congratulations! You can pick up your Kimmy Dora posters any day after September 2 at Wild Ginger restaurant in the basement of Power Plant, Rockwell, Makati. They are open from 11am to 9pm. Sadly, Rockwell has a ‘No Tagalog movies unless they are by Star Cinema’ policy, so Kimmy Dora will not be showing there. But Kimmy Dora opens in many many Metro Manila theatres on Wednesday, September 2.

Why stop now? 16!

August 31, 2009 By: jessicazafra Category: Tennis 6 Comments →

Roger, ang kape!

The US Open starts today, Philippine time.

Here’s the defending champion in 2D selling espresso machines in a houseware store.

In An Open Diary from 2005, Jonathan Ames notes that Roger Federer would be matinee-idol handsome if his eyes weren’t set so close together. (The writer did not see resemblance to famous film director which Filipino tennis fans often bring up.)

We can’t have everything so we’ll settle for grand slam number 16.

I haven’t been watching much tennis lately so I don’t know who the rising stars are, but it is clearly still the Federer-Nadal era. Does anyone know exactly what Rafael Nadal’s injury is? It occurred to me to ask my classmate Dr. Iggy, who is into bones, whether Rafa’s knee problem can be fixed. He says that if it’s patellar tendinitis he may need a longer period to recover, and if it’s severe he may even need surgery. Anyone with details?

* * * * *

Thanks for the details. Rafa has/had insertion tendinitis in both quadriceps tendons and light osseous edema in the kneecaps. Dr. Iggy says: The injury is not dire but it will keep Nadal from playing at his peak. It is a sign of overuse or overtraining. If he has to injure himself to be number one he cannot sustain it.

Marxist Philosophy, Groucho edition

August 31, 2009 By: jessicazafra Category: Books, Movies 1 Comment →


A child of five would understand this. Fetch me a child of five.

I have a mind to join a club and beat you over the head with it.

I have had a perfectly wonderful evening, but this wasn’t it.

Room service? Send up a larger room.

Marriage is a wonderful institution but who wants to live in an institution?

Military justice is to justice as military music is to music.

One morning I shot an elephant in my pyjamas. How he got into my pyjamas I’ll never know.

Those are my principles and if you don’t like them, I have others.

Outside of a dog, a book is a man’s best friend. Inside of a dog it’s too dark to read.

You can quote me as saying I was misquoted.

Is your children lurning?

August 30, 2009 By: jessicazafra Category: Childhood 7 Comments →

Is your children learning?

I are is not so sure.

How to be a published author in this century

August 30, 2009 By: jessicazafra Category: Books, Technology 1 Comment →

First you have to write something.

Everyone thinks she’s a writer, but how many have actually produced a manuscript? Never mind a manuscript worth putting out in book form.

There are many approaches to writing. Some people major in creative writing, others join writing workshops and creativity seminars, still others devour manuals and how-to books. I recommend the most basic approach.

Take pen and paper. Write.

Publishing in the 21st century, the ultra-condensed version, in Emotional Weather Report, today in the Star.

Ribblestrop now accepting students

August 29, 2009 By: jessicazafra Category: Books, Childhood No Comments →

Saffy is reading Ribblestrop

Saffy is reading Ribblestrop (Note her evil stare at the interruption) a wild new children’s book by Andy Mulligan, who is having a book signing today at 4pm at Fully Booked, Bonifacio High Street, Taguig. Everyone’s invited, you can get your copy there.

Ribblestrop is about a very strange English school whose eccentric teachers and unpromising pupils must unravel the mystery of its secret cellars in order to avoid catastrophe.

The Guardian calls Ribblestrop “disgracefully dangerous high octane fun of the first order—an outrageous delight!” The Independent describes it as “a morally questionable tale about a disastrous school whose pupils can be counted on the fingers of one hand.”

A former theatre director, Andy Mulligan has taught at schools in India and Brazil and now teaches at the British School in Manila. For more information, visit