Dear Auntie Janey,
My husband has been working for a BPO on the night shift for more than 2 years now and I suspect he’s cheating on me. When he started with this particular company he would make time for me regardless of how little he’d slept during the day. He would wake up for lunch and talk to me about anything and everything. He would take me to company team events and parties without my asking. He introduced me to his manager and teammates and talked to me about work and how his clients had been a bitch that day. He got home as soon as his shift ended.
A few months ago he started acting differently. He would go home at 7 or 8 in the morning smelling like he’d taken a shower with beer. He would hide his mobile phone under his pillow. Before that he never hid his phone from me. Everytime he gets a phone call, he takes the call in the other room. He hardly talks to me about work and he doesn’t take me to company functions like before, making excuses about budget and everything. Who is he kidding? One of my college batchmates works for the same company and she says that at all company events, spouses are invited, even encouraged to attend. I don’t want to ask my friend to investigate for me because I don’t want to involve her in this.
I think my husband is cheating on me.
Auntie Janey, would it be wrong to act on this hunch? The last time I talked to my husband about this, it ended in a screaming match and broken china. I don’t want that kind of stress level and conflict between me and my husband again. Am I wrong to suspect something’s going on? I don’t have any solid proof that he is having an affair and I don’t know what else to do. Please help.
Annette Bening and Colin Firth played the same characters in Milos Forman’s adaptation of the same novel by Choderlos de Laclos. There was an earlier version starring Jeanne Moreau, directed by Roger Vadim, and later a TV miniseries by Josee Dayan starring Catherine Deneuve. And a teen movie version with Sarah Michelle Gellar, Ryan Philippe and Reese Witherspoon.
Upon reading this question an answer immediately formed in my head but it was incomplete. I may know something about everything but I don’t know everything. I am not God. Not yet.
My knowledge needed to be supported by wisdom fuller than mine and this was one of those times that I needed to summon one of my guiding spirits. I had one in particular in mind and I immediately made preparations for the Rite of Summoning. I took out my bag and put in my ceremonial vestments, a vessel for water, and implements for cleansing.
I went to the gym.